It’s Friday. Thank God. I know I’ve been quiet on this blog lately. My priorities have gotten a little out of whack – too much work, not enough other stuff. Been having a hard time finding that quiet space where I can think. It’s out of that space that my blog posts grow, where more than the “what do I need to do now” thoughts and dreams can grow. I’m thinking I need the coast of Maine. There’s nothing like tucking yourself in between two sun-warmed granite boulders and sitting and watching the water move. Waves in and out, gulls circling over head, lobster boats pulling up traps. Gotta find a place without the tourists though… they can really ruin a good ocean meditation.
In the past month my workload has doubled, more or less. I’m not supervising anyone any more (which frees up some time and brain space) but now I’m running more programs (which eats the brain space back up again). I’m now running 5 programs at work – 4 if you count our domestic program and post-adoption program – both funded by the same state funding stream – as one program. I count ‘em separate, though, because they’re two separate sets of skills and paperwork. I’m really working to try to find balance. To get done as much as I can without using up all of me for that day or that week. It’s not fair to Pete, my other family, and my friends – not to mention to me. At this moment, I’m tired and my brain hurts; I wasn’t that successful with finding the balance this week. Next week is another chance to get it right, though.
I celebrated the end of the week with a Snickers Blizzard from Dairy Queen. 16 glorious Weight Watchers points – quite possibly the best 16 points I’ve spent at one sitting. Except… now I’m hungry again.
Next week will be a short one for me and then I’ll have three glorious days off. I’m really, really looking forward to that. We’re going to a friend’s wedding. We’ll drink, eat, dance, get dressed up, and enjoy ourselves right on the beach. I bought a dress special for the occasion that I’m thinking will knock Pete’s socks off. He hasn’t seen it on me yet – just hanging in the closet. I’m hoping maybe I can steal a little time to sit by the Jersey shore. It’s not the same as the Maine coast but I’m sure there’ll be waves and gulls so it’s a good start.
I love my job. When I love something I tend to put my all into it. The danger of that here is that it could swallow me up. Why is it so hard for me to learn balance?
